The Boss Eater

When the Head and the Subordinate Clash: A Reflection on Bosses, Bitterness, and Broken Systems

What do you expect when you hate your boss, and the head in return hates you?

Total destruction.

What kind of destruction? Let me name it:

· Disturbing the whole administration
· Poisoning professional relationships
· Ruining personal happiness
· Haunting even your dreams in sleep

You develop a feeling of wanting to push that person into the deepest hell—and then run far away from it. But life is life. That person continues to exist, pestering you, objecting to everything you do, and saying all the things you least want to hear.

Seven Heads and Counting

I have worked under seven heads so far. I wonder how many more I will serve before I myself become a head. That thought alone is quite an atrophy to my spirit.

I have never liked to creep into someone else's life, and I never will. Some bosses were exactly as good as a head should be. Others were as bad as a snake—and I confess, I have a sense of senselessness whenever I see a snake.

Please note the point of writing this: I hold no personal grudge. I feel no envy of anyone's success. But having received ill-treatment from some bosses for no apparent reason, I am smeared. I carry those stains.

A Mother's Advice

When I joined my first job, my mother told me: "Whatever you do, do those things that please your heads."

That advice still lingers in my knotty head. But I keep asking myself: "What pleases me?"

And my mother was right. After seven years of working under different heads, I have reached a conclusion: Not everybody pleases the work itself. Rather, one must please the bosses. And in return, the bosses please the subordinates with opportunities and performance grades.

The Radical in Me

However, I am something of a radical. I choose to please my services and my customers, without much botheration about what the head thinks. Some heads clap for this. Others slap my face.

It is difficult to understand.

My colleagues advise me to follow the middle path—not too much, not too little. Just rickety-tick over. So-so kind of work. Some kinds of craps thrown to bosses to keep them happy.

But I feel there is no real destination for people who live that way. They are merely floundering. That is not hard work—that is soft lips. There becomes no distinction between the sincere and the insincere.

The World Belongs to the Head

In such a system, there is no world of your own. The world belongs entirely to the head. The head is the curry cooker—frying all kinds of vegetables in the same pot, regardless of their individual qualities. The head follows his or her own way, and every coworker must follow that rigid set of philosophies.

There is no growth.

It reminds me of a father who wants his son to become exactly like him. Only then does the father become happy. But meanwhile, the son has no extension of his own life. It is a reprobate death—a death without meaning.

The Sad Truth About Bad Bosses

It is sad to know that there are many bosses of this kind. I suspect that all their training in management and administration—all their certificates—do not count for anything when they lack the basic values of a true head.

I believe one responsibility of a leader is to admonish the troops who fall out of line—not to appreciate those who stray. I also believe a head should be an archetype of the place where he or she lives: broadminded, acceptable, committed, responsible. These are the qualities and principles that a true head should embody.

But from what I have seen and learned from my many heads, the reality has been absolutely contrary to these ideals.

The Pinch of Salt

Because of these so-called bogus heads, everything gets spoiled. The taste of a curry is made by the salt. The head is like a big pinch of salt—essential. But when this taste-adder plays tricks with subordinates, the whole dish becomes fishy.

I have witnessed incidents of bullying subordinates. Threatening to award lower points in final ratings. Even abusing minorities.

And blah, blah, blah...

The Final Question

After all these mistakes, we still say: "The head is always right."

But I have a question for the readers:

Is it one head that is always right—or many heads?

The Dragon New Year

Isn't New Year celebrated with pomp and joy by nearly every race around the world?

99% of people do that.

BUT, what is there to celebrate when we have so many antagonisms and complications arising every year? New diseases, new terrorist groups, new WMDs, new problems. Nothing great to celebrate. No new joy, no new peace. What is truly new in the New Year? I have no New Year fever, no excitement—only worries about new problems.

Why is New Year called "new"? "New" should mean flawlessly new. But I will have no new brain to think, no new clothes, no new shoes, no new meal. Nothing is new. No gala, no new friends, no toasts from loved ones, no new love—ah! I am not New Year passionate. I am as usual as I ever was. Nothing is great to rejoice over on that day.

Years come and go. New Year's Day is merely the mark of the end of one year and the beginning of the next—the day on which the year count is incremented.

On that day, called New Year, I will miss my dear and near ones far away in Bhutan. Alone here, I will find myself reflecting on the delighted faces and the scenes of togetherness. Yet my New Year resolutions keep me hopeful, even though I may not stick to any one of them. And sometimes, it hurts to plan ahead for 2012. "New Year brings in new promises," as many would say.

And I would like to leave here with a New Year poem by Ella Wheeler Wilcox:

"What can be said in New Year rhymes,
That's not been said a thousand times?
The new years come, the old years go,
We know we dream, we dream we know.
We rise up laughing with the light,
We lie down weeping with the night.
We hug the world until it stings,
We curse it then and sigh for wings.
We live, we love, we woo, we wed,
We wreathe our prides, we sheet our dead.
We laugh, we weep, we hope, we fear,
And that's the burden of a year."

Blog and block from blockage

Blog, Twit, Goof, and the Many Worlds of the Net

There are many worlds inside the net world.

There is the world of Twitter, where people go to twit—sharing short, fleeting thoughts that vanish almost as quickly as they appear. There is the world of blogs, built for bloggers who long to express themselves at greater length. There is the world of Facebook, designed for face time or faced time—depending on whether you are truly connecting or merely performing. Then there is Google, where people goof off, drowning in unwanted information. And Yahoo, which greets you with a cheerful "tai-ho-a" before disappearing into irrelevance.

And scores of other inactive terms—carping, waiting, begging to be clicked.

Blog and Block from the Blockage

Now, there is the blog. And what I would like to call: Blog and block from the blockage of knowledge.

The site I am using recently is another addition to this universe—bringing both fun and weight. And I mean weight in two senses: the weight to my body, from sitting too long, and the weight to my mind, from thinking too deeply.

Sitting in front of a laptop, writing and reading, is undeniably rewarding for intellectual growth. But blog, twit, goof—what does all of this do to the body? What does it do to the soul?

We sit. We stare. We type. We scroll. The body pays a price, even as the mind expands.

What Matters in the End

Anyways, I hope to have a good time here. Because at the end of everything, what truly matters is not health alone, nor wealth alone—but good times.

Good times with words. Good times with thoughts. Good times with people who introduce us to new worlds.

A Note of Gratitude

Thank you, Monu Tamang—my sincere and dedicated student—for introducing me to this space.

I believe in you. And I am proud of you.

Dreams, Aims, and Aspirations: A Reflection by Simple Saacha Dorji

Good time reading, readers.

I am… yeah… I am neither Martin Luther King Jr., nor Shiv Khera, nor a Buddhist philosopher, nor Helen Keller to lecture on any topic. I am Simple Saacha Dorji—an original piece of earth,

I write: "If you have dreams, then you can do it." This is my small stuff, which has titillated me throughout life, and here I write about it: dreams, aims, and aspirations. Yes, titillated.

"I Have a Dream"—Martin Luther King Jr.'s famous speech at a gathering in the USA—was a powerful piece of oratory meant to bring welfare and happiness to the American people. That was his dream. And did he fulfill it? Of course, it turned out to be very short. Not the dream—his life. Tragic. But the dream lived on. See?

Likewise, every one of us has dreams, aims, and aspirations. Once you are on this earth, your dreams germinate like rivers—or sometimes like weeds. And if you are not able to fulfill these dreams, you tend to lose your head. And that is where you will have lots of shadows in your life. Shadows are bad. They make you trip.

Everyone has so many questions about dreams and aspirations. What is my true dream? The most important dream in my life? How will it come true? Where will I go? When will it fulfill? Etc., etc., etc.—the etceteras are endless. Paulo Coelho, in The Alchemist, wrote, "When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it." I think by now, you just have to dream and begin the journey—the journey from your heart. 

I remember I had so many dreams. When I look back now, my dreams would have all become real—if only reality hadn't gotten in the way. When I was eight years old, I had a passion for singing. One fine day, I sang in front of my class. And who (the hell) was there to bring my dream to an untimely end? Teachers and students. I became a fun bag—not a fun bag as in "bag full of fun," but a laughingstock. A human joke. From that day, I was really brainwashed. Every time, in my mind, it recurred: 'I can't sing well. I can't sing well.' The next time I was asked to sing, I wanted to disappear underground—preferably to a country where singing is illegal. (Of course, I have other dreams realizing slowly now. I'd like to write about them in the next article. 

We have many hesitations in our dreams. We are frightened and discouraged if once we couldn't perform well. We expect readymade results—like instant noodles, but for life. We don't believe in ourselves and don't have the courage to move on. These are walls. The walls between you and the future world. Also, sometimes actual walls. Don't walk into those.

In the movie Field of Dreams, there was a different type of dream portrayed. Iowa Farmer Ray Kinsella had a dream and vision to build a basketball court in his cornfield. That vision in his mind was not discussed with or asked of anyone. What kind of dream is this? It is actually building a castle in the air! With corn. Very strange. But hey, it worked in Hollywood.

Do you know your reality? Do you ask and discuss your dreams frequently? Or are you afraid of people who will mock you? Or do you truly believe in your dreams and worship them and not want to discuss them with others? Ask, and you will get answers to all these rhetorical questions. (

I realized now that my singing dream could have been fulfilled. Don't you think so? A force pulled me down so that I had to leave that dream. Force? Yes, forces are our teachers, our parents, our environment, and our friends—who influence us, often whether we like it or not. Sometimes the force is strong. Other times, it's just your uncle asking, "And what will you do with that degree?"

Dreams are like seeds. If we put those seeds in the soil properly, they will surely grow into a fruitful harvest. But who bothers? Forces again! Also, pests. And bad weather. And laziness.

The inside force is stronger than the exterior one. Is that so? Yalp. That's the fact. So we must believe from the vision inside; we should have discipline and determination. We are all-powerful. We can also climb the highest mountain. We can also make alcohol out of water. (Wait. That's called brewing. Never mind.) I am not talking about magic; I am talking about dreams coming true, your inner heart, and your inner dreams. If you have interest, hard work, courage, and a little bit of God in you, whatever work you do, everything will come true. You can go for that.

Or you can stay on the couch. Your choice. But don't say I didn't warn you.

Regards,
Saacha Dorji
(Original piece of earth, failed singer, professional dreamer)